The Conservatives Marked Up Copy Of The Bill Of Rights

The Conservatives Marked Up Copy Of The Bill Of Rights
The Conservatives Marked Up Copy Of The Bill Of Rights
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3 thoughts on “The Conservatives Marked Up Copy Of The Bill Of Rights

  1. The liberal bill of rights:
    I: No right to any statement that “hurts” anyone, or to “obscene” music lyrics, or “Hate speech,” or any flag or artwork that is “racist” or “sexist” or “transphobic” or a “microaggression.” Displays of perversion in kindergarten are okay, though.

    II: That’s outdated, racist.

    III: Don’t worry, we’ll get to it.

    IV: No right to be secure in your possessions. Those belong to “society.” And of course, it would be perfectly okay to take guns from people. And it’s not “stealing,” it’s “equality.”

    V: If you’ve ever made a statement that could be taken out of context as any kind of -ist, you must be made to pay for it forever. And if a jury acquits you of an alleged attack, you should be stalked and harassed until the day you die, and everyone involved in your acquittal shamed as a “racist.”

    VI: Trials should be impartial, except for racists, sexists, homophobes and other people we decide via social media are bigots of some form or another, because fuck them, they don’t deserve human rights. Trials are racist anyway. And minorities are only minorities if we say they are, in which case they’re innocent regardless of the crime because “white patriarchy” made them do it.

    VII: What do we need juries for civil process for? That’s just an excuse for rich people to get away with crap.

    VIII: OMFG! I can’t believe you even said this! This literally triggered me, it’s so racist!

    IX: Rights are a fabrication of white capitalist cismale oppressors. Very convenient for people with money.

    X: “Individual” rights are just an excuse by capitalists to concentrate wealth. Society has to come first. And “States rights” is just code for racism.

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